CONVERSATIONS

WITH SELF

& OTHER STORIES

curated & written by Sayla

PREFACE

Humbly, I’m with the hippies that believe that there are no finite approaches/intents/methods to and for creating/consuming art – on the contrary, it is an endless experimentation; a utopia-like window for creative freethinkers.

I believe more often than not; art itself is conceived by the pursuit to release, express and embed a bit of self onto the fabric of existence– whatever reason(s) that might be (don’t let them snotty elitists tell you otherwise).

Whilst I’m prepared to be snubbed for the creative nature of this body of work, there will be no apologies. I am aware that not everyone might appreciate/understand/enjoy my work (for that, i feel sorry), and that’s really okay. Nonetheless, these are still precious vignettes of my mind and spirit that I find dear and important in marking my episodes in life.

Even before toying with rap, I have enjoyed clumsily traversing disciplines - poetry, painting and song writing; resulting in really messy expressions ('abstract' sounds too cool). Needless to say, my work made sense to very few people aside from myself. Tbh I’d paint and pen with no clear vision in mind – letting my subconscious steer the ship, so to say. Recurrently, my lyric and poems unfolded to be blanketed conversations and with (spoiler alert) myself.

This project is a collection of songs written and composed applying that very approach; chaptered into 4 parts. Some completely performed and produced on my own, some covers, some with the help of amazingly talented friends.

Albeit quite a handful of these songs have a decipherable theme or topic; many a tracks here blossomed from a singular feeling – eventually unfolding (or layered) to become what they are.

The songs on CWSAOS have been picked from an even wider library of solo and collaborative recordings in the last 4 years. I’m proud of these songs, and I thank everyone that has a hand in making them real.

Love x Light.

Sayla

Part I:

CLOSE EYES TO EXIST

Sometimes, the most fragile fears and revelations show their faces in time of calm and reflection; even in intimate states of prayer. Often, for me, it’s in these moments that I feel most present – when the smoke screen and noise are muted; with breathing space to dig in on feelings, vibes and experiences – setting the stage for bittersweet epiphanies, melancholic acceptances and eventual contentment. 

PART II:

Come as you please

YOLO whatever whatever, but spur-of-the-moment ideas and indulgences are like turnt night-outs, they’ve got the makings of the best times of your life. The only off take – you’ll need to jump the cliff to nosedive into the water(BAM!).

Here’s to instincts and trusting them to take lead; from satiating in blind senseless acts of nowness, to attracting and pacifying tensions-  from sex and stress to duress.

`

PART III:

COURTING OWLS (KINTSUKUROI)

Of goddesses, love, lust and muses.

PART IV:

CONVERSATIONS

WITH SELF

We all cope in our own ways.

But this, it’s more than talking to yourself.

I don’t talk to myself –  the crazies talk to themselves.

I write songs to myself (Ayyy for nut jobs)!

For a good while, I wasn’t sure to whom and why I was writing and talking to or for – I’d just pen all these things with phantom shadows in mind.

Took me awhile to figure they were journal entries to myself.

What caught me off guard most was what I was telling myself, really – not always flattering, and at times, a little fucked up.   

Perhaps it’s therapeutic, I can’t tell rn tbh.

It still happens, these self-conversations; this time around though, I pay it a bit more mind; observing self.

AFTERWORD

I’m not sure how to end this.

I guess in retrospect, the body of work here started out as unrelated experiments, just fucking around with new canvases and styles in composing and writing.

Unintentionally, it all came together as a (mostly melancholic?) memoir of sort.

Life is a personalized mystery box, as far as I’m concerned. I think I have all the answers, of course; but so does everyone else. However, when that particular rite of passage in life hits you; watching your folks grow old, having friends succumbed to drugs, loved ones divorced, some battling cancer, et cetera; Reality sinks in quick; the box isn’t all fun and games anymore.

And I guess that’s where words and music come to play, in my mystery box at least.

Thanks for listening.

Sayla

ARTWORK

Conversations With Self & Other Stories is the result of elaborate collaborations and shared ideas. The artworks however were left to each artist's interpretation with only a handful of songs and chapter titles as guides.